


Don't wanna be your friend  (I wanna kiss your neck)

by orphan_account



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, little make out session, part two will have smut, sad narry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-21
Updated: 2016-11-21
Packaged: 2018-09-01 08:20:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8616595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: "I want to be in here" he continues lowly hoping that Nialls team aren't eavesdropping "I want to be with you" and god does he mean it in so many more ways than Niall will ever know. He smiles nodding his cheeks glowing bashfully " I want you here with me too" Or Niall and Harry reunite at the ama's





	

The thing is, Niall is just so pretty, so exceptionally beautiful and alluring that it shouldn't be allowed really, and even though he's changed a lot the past few months and harry curses himself that he wasn't there to witness the change with his own eyes, he wasn't there to witness Niall's confidence soar and his smile get brighter, he wasn't there, but he's here now, with Niall. and he hopes that's enough, even though he knows it's not, not really, because Niall is still kind of distant and he still has this wall build that wasn't there for years and Harry managed to break down and throw the bricks away and Niall let him in more than he let anyone in, let Harry know him more than he knows himself , let him touch and hold and take care of the most secret parts of him and now he can hardly get him to look him in the eyes and it hurts more than he cares to admit to himself. 

"ya alright?" he turns around from where he's pretending to mingle in Nialls dressing room and wow it kind of pains him that's it Niall's not theirs and his heart clenches at the thought so he clears his mind and throat turning around with a smile "yeah just eh, mingling" he mumbles looking down at the floor and resisting the urge to just grab Niall and pull him close because jesus, he definitely knows what the glasses do to him and he's definitely only wearing them to be an extra little teasing minx but Harry can't think of those kind of thoughts right now not when Niall still refuses to even hug him never mind do well... that. "You don't have to be here ya know if you feel uncomfortable, you can alway-" Harry cuts him off his voice louder than he wanted "No!" He feels embarrassed and he swears he see's Nialls lip twitch in an oh so attractive grin as he clears his throat gripping at his short hair a little "I want to be in here" he continues lowly hoping that Nialls team aren't eavesdropping "I want to be with you" and god does he mean it in so many more ways than Niall will ever know. He smiles nodding his cheeks glowing bashfully " I want you here with me too" and  he could take a picture of his smile frame it and never get tired of looking at it but then it's gone and then that damn wall is back and his smile drops his shoulders hunch and he lips purse in a way that shouldn't be endearing but it is and wow. He's never wanted to break something as much in his life. He wants to break the wall again kick it down break the bricks and never let Niall build one up again because he wants to be let in always.

"Niall!" someone shouts and there's a knock on the door and Niall is needed, he looks relieved as he's whisked away to get changed out of his casual jeans his cute little shirt with the collar all stretched out and the sleeves stressed looking into a suit and fancy shoes and as soon as he's there he's gone and Harrys left alone again. He feels awkward as he looks around Nialls dressing room and there's just Niall's manager typing furiously on his phone and his hair stylist laying on the couch on his phone also and its so quiet he wants to leave and find Niall again even if he doesn't speak his presence is enough it'll always be enough. He could definitely go out and mingle but that means he'll get seen and pictures will spread like wildfire and he quite likes keeping his head down now days. 

So he has no choice but to sit on the sofa and watch as people start arriving on the red carpet from the tv which is playing lowly. Nobody in the room even spares a second glance at him and it makes him wonder what Niall told them, if they know what happened and it makes him feel smaller every second that passes. He smiles as he hear Nialls name get mentioned on the telly and fuck Nialls really doing it isn't he? He's smashing it and he's a solo artist now he's doing  what he loves on stage by himself and he looks so happy and in love with his job that Harry feels so proud he's practically spilling with it. He's proud of him and he wishes he had the guts to tell Niall how amazing he is and how beautiful the song is and how he had it on repeat the entire night the first day it got released listening over and over until he had every note word and strum stuck in his head and his cheeks were wet and salty with tears with thoughts of what he had and lost and he just keeps thinking of that one line 'everything comes back to you' and he hopes it's true desperately wishes that Niall is singing the truth.

It feels like ages until Niall is finally back in the room all suited up and looking so gorgeous he feels weak at the knees and the things he wants to do to this boy are beyond him. "Oh Harry" he sounds surprised as he spots Harry still sitting on the couch his short hair messy and his shirt half unbuttoned. "Expect me to leave" he chuckles nervously watching the blonde clean his glasses off his sleeve before he sends him a closed off look his blue eyes swimming with emotional that he wishes he could detect "wouldn't be the first time would it?" He flinches as if Niall just smacked him straight across the face but Niall merrily looks down letting ellie continue to pull at his suit adjusting the legs playing about with his quiff again not acknowledging Harry. He wants to ask why Niall even invited him because all he feels is awkward and upset and he just wants to go home and pet his cat eat some yogurt maybe call Gemma and rant to her about this but no, he'll stick it out show Niall he won't be running away from what matters anymore not if he can help it anyway. 

"I-can we talk?" He clears his throat licking at his sore lips as Niall finally looks him in eye "privately" he gestures to the five or six people rushing in and out the room and he couldn't possibly tell niall anything with so many ears listening. He wonders where they could go to talk by themselves in a place so big filled with so many people but he knows he's won when Niall chews his bottom lip and nods quickly whispering a quick "I'll be five minutes tops" to ellie and he's suddenly grabbing his wrist and nodding at the rest of his crew and waving because it's Niall and he's kind and thoughtful and he's just- well he's everything really isn't he? to Harry he is. Harry desperately wishes they weren't backstage at an award show of all places right now he'd much rather be back in Nialls London home on his incredibly comfortable couch with his many fluffy cushions and blankets and he could just sink into the material and have an intimate conversation with the blonde, kind of like how he used to do well before. Not here where people are looking as they continue to walk or Niall continues to walk and he just follows him noting that Nialls hand is still gripping his wrist, not tightly but it's a comfortable weight that makes his belly go on fire with butterflies and they're rolling around his stomach flying up to his neck and he can't do anything except stare at the back of his now more brunette hair trying to not avert his eyes lower down to his ass or his thighs as he walks briskly. 

Finally Niall stops at a bathroom that looks deserted and he pulls them both in. The light isn't even on so they're in darkness for a moment before Niall flicks the switch and the not very flattering light comes on and he can see him again. He doesn't know what to say because his throat feels clogged and his stomach is flipping and burning his hands are shaking and he misses his long hair at times like this.  
"okay so talk" Niall says flatly leaning against the door as Harry does the same to the sinks and he can't help but wonder if Niall should be on the red carpet right now he looks so beautiful he deserves to get photographed always really but Harry feels greedy. He has Niall to himself for a moment in time and will hold onto it for as long as he can. 

"Why did you even invite me here if you're going to just act like a prick" he huffs out lowly watching as Nialls hard stare softens. 

"I'm not Harry-" he says quietly but the taller of the two cuts him off

"please, you ignored me the entire time we were back here, you left me in a room full of people I don't even know- who seem to hate me by the way" he mumbles out his fists clenching and his stare hard. 

"It's just hard for me Harry you need to understand" 

"Then help me understand, tell me what I did wrong because this is just fucking childish, this going back and forth ignoring my calls not looking at me, inviting me as your date to a fucking award show and then not even a talking to me I am not a fool Niall please don't treat me like one" his voice turns soft towards the end as he walks towards the small blonde so they're facing each other. 

" I did want you here, I wouldn't of invited you here if I didn't, I want you Harry I do" it frustrates Harry how soft and gentle he sounds when there's nothing gentle about this conversation but he just stares at Niall and his beautiful features taking in his eyes wanting nothing more but to drown in them look into them forever and never get tired of finding new colours that speckle around the blue and hide in the corners. 

"You don't act like it" he let's out a quiet mumble his voice deep and hard. 

"Letting you in isn't easy Harry" and he wishes Niall would stop saying his name because it's slowly killing him.

"You think coming here was easy? You think seeing you again was easy? It fucking isn't Niall this isn't just about you this is about us" he curses in the way that Niall looks down at his brown boots his face contorting and he just breathes deeply for a few seconds and Harry hates it because that means he's nervous or anxious or both and he doesn't want to make Niall feel those things. 

"You just left Harry, you left and forgot me and it was hard and it hurt and I know I'm stupid for not letting it go but I can't, you hurt me, more than I ever thought you could" 

"We all left Niall, I wasn't the only one to leave we all walked away and decided it was a good idea-" he starts to say slowly staring straight at the blonde but Nialls louder tone cuts him off. 

"I'm not talking about the band Harry, this isn't about the band anymore and you know it, you left me and what we had and you never looked back and you expect me to just sweep everything under the carpet like it never happened, maybe you can do that but I can't - I won't" Harry suddenly feels angry, Niall thinks so little of him and it kills him but also makes a bubble of anger fill his stomach. 

"You're acting like we dated for years, we were hooking up Niall nothing more nothing less" although he wishes it was more desperately  wishes it was more he feels dread fill his body as Niall looks shocked for a moment his eyes slowly filling with tears and no no no this is not what he wanted never wants to make him cry ever, although he also said he'd never hurt him but look where they are now. Niall huffs taking off his glasses and wiping his eyes quickly. 

"Well I might of been just a quick shag to you Harry, someone to just fuck at the end of the day, but it felt like more to me and maybe I'm the fool for ever thinking I would ever be more to you" his voice cracks and his eyes swim with hurt and Harrys never wanted to hug someone so bad wants to just cup his face and kiss his pain away lick at his mouth and bite at his lips until all his hurt goes.  

Niall is turning and he's about to open the door but no Harry can't have that so he slams it closed with his hand not caring about who hears anymore. Niall looks shocked as Harry backs him into the door his arms going either side of the blondes head his face so close he can count every freckle on his nose and every mole and beauty spot on his neck and god he wants to kiss him. 

"I'm sorry" he really is sorry for making him feel that way for leaving and not treating him the way he deserves. 

"Let me go" Niall whispers his eyes brimming with tears as Harry just gets closer until their breath hits off each others skin and he's so beautiful so irresistible stronger men than him wouldn't be able to resist the temptation that is Niall. 

"I won't, I don't want to, I won't let you go if you let me, if you don't let me go either" and he knows Niall knows he's not just speaking about their current positions by the way his eyes look up into his and his breath catches. 

"You are more to me Niall, you were always more, you were everything and you still are, you're still everything" he continues and he knows it's cheesy and Niall would snort at him if they were in any other situation but he means every word. 

"we can't just go back to how it used to be Harry" and there's this god damn wall still up and he's never hated something as much. 

"Can't we at least try? You invited me here that means something, and you want me to fight for you? Then here I am fighting for you if you'll have me"   
He doesn't know how because it happens so quickly but Nialls hands are suddenly cupping his cheeks and his face is getting pulled close and they're kissing they're actually kissing. He doesn't pull away course he doesn't he kisses back enthusiastically his hands moving to his waist pushing up his jacket and smart shirt to touch his skin that he hasn't felt in his hands for nearly a year. It's desperate and wet but so hot and everything he ever needed as Niall whimpers lowly into his mouth his mouth moving wetly with Harrys his thumbs rubbing over his slight stubble before moving to grip at his now short hair. They're moving and Harry lifts Niall just as easily as before up onto the bathroom counter not caring that anyone could walk in.  
"Fuck" Niall breathes as they separate for a moment before crashing together again his hands moving to lift him closer to him by his ass his hands squeezing appreciatively at the blondes assets. It's wet and soft as he licks into Nialls mouth rubbing their tongues together before deeply kissing him once more and even though he feels out of breath and lightheaded it's the best he's ever felt in a while. 

"Harry- Harry" Niall pulls away first his chest heaving and his eyes look glazed over and his hair is messed up oh so prettily. But Harry can't get enough can't ever get enough of Niall and fuck would it be inappropriate to take him on this counter make him his once more? He leans down to kiss his neck and collarbones his wet lips hot on the blondes pale unmarked perfect skin. "Baby" he breathes lowly as he pulls away from his neck leaving a few chaste kisses on Nialls now swollen pink lips. 

"I have to go" and no no he can't have that. 

"stay here with me" he whines like a child and he knows things are still messy and a few kisses can't make everything better but it feels like it did. 

"I have to walk the red carpet if I'm late ellie and management will have my head" he chuckles breathlessly his hands running over Harrys jaw the stubble pricking his hand. 

"You'll come back to me when you're done?" He asks pulling his hands away from where they were resting on Nialls thighs and helping him tuck in his shirt and button up his jacket purposely leaving the top few buttons open so a little peek of chest hair is showing. It feels so domestic and how did they end up here in the matter of ten minutes? 

"Always " Niall mumbles kissing his cheek and jumping off the counter just as he hears a few people calling his name and he knows he's late and he's probably going to get scalded but he honest to god couldn't care less. 

"as long as you'll be waiting here for me" Niall mumbles shyly and the wall is gone if not only a little bit still up and he knows they're still broke and they're messy they might not even be with each other tomorrow and they're not perfect but who is really and they're both different now a year has passed and they've grown and flown more than they both thought possible but they're with each other right now and no one else really matters as long as he has Niall by his side just as he always said and he'll always mean it, Niall really is the one isn't he? So he just smiles forgetting about tomorrow and the award show waiting for Niall forgets that they still have so much to work out so he just smiles and drops a few more kisses on the already kiss bitten lips. 

"Yeah, always" and then he's gone out the door leaving Harry with a smile and an adorable wink as he rushes off to be the pop star he is. and Harry's all alone again.

**Author's Note:**

> helloo part two will be smutty and up soon .x


End file.
